On BCM.

Today was not only my last day of class as an undergraduate, but tonight was my last BCM ever.

I don’t get emotional about moving on very often, but when my friends started giving senior speeches and talking about what the last four years have really meant, I couldn’t help but tear up a little bit.

And as mad as I was about there not being a senior video, I have to admit that it might be a good thing. Don’t know if I could’ve handled that.

I chose not to give a formal senior speech for a couple of reasons, but this post will do a better job of saying what BCM has meant to me than any speech would have anyways.

BCM wasn’t the biggest part of my college experience, and it wasn’t even the most important, but I can honestly say that it had a huge impact on the last four years.

Without BCM, I probably wouldn’t have this group of beautiful friends (plus a few other lovelies not in this picture). There have been crazy times in the last few years, but somehow we managed to stick together since the freshman girls bible study that brought us all together in the first place. & I think we’ve come pretty far.

BCM 1Without BCM I probably wouldn’t have ended up with these two crazy roommates for the past couple of years either. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without them, and I don’t know what I’m going to do once we move out of the lovely Harriett Plantation. But BCM brought us together, and I will always be thankful for that.

BCM 2BCM also changed my whole life plan. Whoa. If I hadn’t done Sendmenow Summer missions, I might not have ever even thought about going into occupational therapy, and now I can’t imagine going into anything else.

& speaking of Sendmenow missions, without BCM I would have never started working at Camp Hawkins or Camp Jackie, and I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to fall in love with so many precious kids like these::

BCM 3..or have had the opportunity to work with so many amazing people there. Like these crazy ladies and so many more that aren’t in the picture.

BCM 3Without BCM I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to go on seven different mission trips over the past four years, and I wouldn’t have gotten to spread Jesus and love on precious babies in Ecuador or Haiti.

BCM 4

And most importantly, I wouldn’t be where I am today in my relationship with Jesus. Just having a time to worship and learn with my friends every week made such a huge difference.

I would like to think that I’ve changed a lot in these past four years, and BCM has been a major part of that. Friends, a couple of awesome interns, a great campus minister, and missions opportunities have all helped me grow in more ways than I would have imagined when I signed up for an email list at summer orientation.

I feel like I need to say that, as great as it has been, it hasn’t been all rainbows & butterflies. People in BCM have hurt me and made me cry, and I’ve probably done the same to them. I’ve been offended, felt unappreciated, gotten mad at the way things happened, and even said a few a lot of things that I probably shouldn’t have. I also didn’t find my future husband, so that’s kind of disappointing. You know, whatever. But overall, I’m so, so glad that I didn’t just give up then because it has definitely been worth it.

I wouldn’t trade these past four years at Mercer for anything. I found a community that I loved here at this school, but I found my family at BCM. & while I’m ready to move on and see what’s next, I’m going to miss it so much. You don’t just find a family anywhere. I have been so blessed.

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Elf & Worship.

When it comes to Christmas movies, I have to say that Elf is definitely my favorite.  & I know a lot of people agree with me.  I despise A Christmas Story, and others like The Santa Clause just don’t even come close to Elf.  I love pretty much everything about the movie.  Well, everything except the excessive use of maple syrup which kind of makes me gag.

But overall, I just love itThere’s this awesome scene in the movie when Santa needs more Christmas spirit in order to get his sleigh to fly.  & since everyone knows that “The best way to spread Christmas Cheer is singing loud for all to hear,” Jovie starts singing Santa Claus is Coming to Town. Soon enough everyone is joining in and Santa’s sleigh is getting close to flying.

Everyone is singing along when Michael notices that his dad isn’t really singing, he’s only moving his lips. Even though Walter doesn’t see what the big deal is, as soon as he starts singing, there is enough Christmas cheer to get Santa’s sleigh flying.

I was thinking during church this morning that sometimes I feel like Walter during  worship.

Sometimes, usually because I’m not where I should be spiritually, I just don’t feel like singing the words to whatever song we’re singing.  For example, I feel like I can’t sing that I’m giving everything to God when I know I’m not.  So I just move my lips & act like I’m singing along.

I mean, this isn’t terrible, but I’ve noticed, kind of like Walter, that when I make myself say the words, something neat happens.  Now I’m not saying that Santa’s sleigh flew over my church this morning, but sometimes just making myself sing the words changes something.

Sometimes, even though I know I’m not where I should be, moving past that and worshiping through it makes the biggest difference.  Because here’s the thing, God totally knows where I am.  I can’t fool God by moving my lips just like Walter couldn’t fool his son. & I feel like it’s a whole lot better to worship God from whatever point I’m at than it is to pretend to worship Him.  That does absolutely nothing.

So from now on, I’m going to do my best to sing all the words.  Because for me, it works.  It changes things and starts to make them better.

& who knows, maybe Santa’s sleigh will fly over my church one day.  It would be pretty awesome..